The Testing of a Wizard - Viktor Gitin

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time I thrown a ball. I haven’t ordered a new dress all week. I have nothing to wear into town.

FADRIUS – Your Majesty, you already have a beautiful wardrobe of dresses. There are three thousand three hundred and twenty-seven dazzling dresses, for all thinkable occasions.

QUEEN – What are you talking about! You think I should go about in old rags? How can you all be so cruel to your Queen!

FADRIUS – But of course not Your Majesty! We all love you. I’m just thinking that the kingdom can survive without new dresses and balls. What is more important is that, by my calculations this year we will have a drought. And a bad harvest would destroy our peasants.

QUEEN – Stop trying to scare me. You’re telling me that I might starve!

FADRIUS – Not you. But it will be hard for your subjects to survive the drought.

QUEEN – Well do something then, after all you’re a Wizard.

FADRIUS – I’m sorry Your Majesty, but there is nothing I can do.

QUEEN – Why? It is so easy. One magic spell and we will have good weather.

FADRIUS – The matter is, my Queen I have become too old. I do not possess the magic power that is needed to do anything…

QUEEN – Here we go, you’re upsetting me again! My migraine is coming back, shame on you!

FADRIUS – Your Majesty, I want you to know the truth. My powers are deteriorating.

QUEEN – I don’t want to hear that! You have to do something. I can’t lead this disgusting life anymore. I’m sick and tired of all the problems, which my ministers are throwing at me.

FADRIUS – But Your Majesty after the death of the King you are now the head of state, and you should rule the country.

QUEEN – It’s always done something, something, something… Why do I owe everyone something, and they don’t owe me anything?

FADRIUS – That’s the burden of power. A head of state is not only about the right to rule, but the responsibility for the country’s affairs and all the people in it.

QUEEN – And who will take care of me?!

FADRIUS – Us, your beloved servants.

QUEEN – I don’t feel it! All that I see is your desire to upset me more and more each day.

FADRIUS(Disheartened) Your Majesty, just today I was going to tell you all about my new plan. It is possible; if it succeeds it will solve all our problems.

QUEEN – And I will be able to throw a dazzling ball at last?

FADRIUS(Heavy sigh) Yes, I hope you will.

QUEEN – Fadrius! If your plan will not help me to find money to buy new outfits, then why do I need it? What’s the point?!

FADRIUS – There are more important things in the Kingdom than balls and new dresses.

QUEEN – Don’t talk such nonsense! I thought you were a smart Wizard. But I guess I was wrong about you.

FADRIUS – I won’t argue with you. But anyway, let me explain my plan.

QUEEN – Oh! How boring and frustrating this is… Ok, I’m listening.

FADRIUS – My dear Queen, I have been thinking for a very long time, what can help our Kingdom from the disastrous events, which preceded us after the Kings death. I wanted to find one solution to all the problems. For days and nights, I was restless trying to find the answer…

QUEEN – Fadrius, can you get to the point. I feel my migraine coming back.

FADRIUS – I think I have found the answer. The only thing that will help us is a MIRACLE. There is a mention of it in a very old magical manuscript. This MIRACLE is hidden very far away, near the edge of the earth.

QUEEN – What is this?

FADRIUS – It is a certain magical substance able to grant the wishes of the beholder. But unfortunately, only one wish is permitted.

QUEEN(Disappointed) Only one! That’s a disgrace. I’ve already accumulated a thousand different wishes.

FADRIUS – That’s not the biggest problem my Queen. I think I will be able to create a formula that can grant all the thousand wishes you have. Especially since most of your wishes are not very varied or original.

QUEEN – If this is true, why haven’t you brought this MIRCALE to my palace?

FADRIUS – That’s my biggest problem. I cannot do this.

QUEEN – Here we go! You’re trying to upset me again.

FADRIUS – The problem is that my powers aren’t what they used to be. And not everyone can get to the place where the MIRCACLE is kept. But even if one can overcome all the hurdles and get there, there is still the problem to actually obtain it. The only one who can possess this MIRACLE is someone with a pure soul and elevated intentions.

QUEEN – Someone like me?

FADRIUS(With light irony and sarcasm) I’m afraid neither you nor me will be suitable because we’re not young and innocent as we used to be. Our souls are not pure enough to possess this MIRACLE.

QUEEN – Nonsense! My soul is pure and untainted, like a child’s tears. Just because I helped my mother in-law to an early grave, surely that doesn’t mean that I’m a sinner? That’s how everyone acts. And it wasn’t my fault that my brother in-law walked into a cage with tigers; I just informed my husband that his brother was plotting against him. I don’t know why he thought it was a good idea to go into the cage with a hungry predator, when he was drunk. And after all I’m a woman! And women are forgiven for being mischievous. So, after all I’m aloud to be in control of this MIRACLE.

FADRIUS – I’m sorry Your Majesty but the Wizard’s law is very strict. If your

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